Sometimes we look so far to find happiness when we don’t even realize that happiness is in our hearts, waiting patiently to be released. ~ Anonymous
A “Boomer” friend of mine has been searching for happiness for as long as I’ve known him (over 3 years) – maybe forever … he went through a bitter divorce some years ago. Then he found new love (in his tentative way) a few years later and two years into their relationship, she was diagnosed with stage 4 leukemia and pass away a few months later. When I met him, he was just reaching out from the loss of his sweetheart. His relationship with his kids was rocky at best. He was seeking “happiness” through a variety of destructive behaviors. But there was a sadness and a sweetness about him that I could neither ignore nor resist.
Over the last few years I have watched him work through some very difficult times. The common thread in his struggle has been searching for that which will make him happy – fulfill him. He has a career that will shortly be providing him a reasonable retirement; has been financially responsible in providing for his & his children’s future; has a profitable home-based consulting business; owns a comfortable home – a comfortable life and future by anyone’s standards. And yet he has spent a lifetime of searching for happiness … to be released from his emptiness. I have seen a successful man who lacks social self confidence and is afraid of being vulnerable – as if allowing himself to “be happy” or to “surrender to love” will guarantee being hurt and abandoned again. He has had no idea what a sweet and loving person he is, or what is “enough” … our friendship has been held at bay as “just friends” because if we are “just friends”, he could walk away if it got uncomfortable for him.
Lately he has been evolving daily in wonderful, positive ways – finally realizing that he has all the “things” he needs to be comfortable. He is becoming more comfortable and happy with himself, trusting his intuitions. He is realizing he has the love of someone who accepts him for who he is with all his imperfections who is not going to hurt him. He is opening up to the vulnerability of surrendering to love – to trusting someone else to care for his heart .. and that the comfort and contentedness and happiness he seeks is actually right under his nose and in his heart – just waiting patiently to be released.
Why do we so often search for something we feel is missing in our lives when in reality it is within us already? If that which we seek we cannot find within, we will not find it without. Looking inward is hard work – searching our selves for the answers we seek is work – but so much more rewarding than the endless seeking “out there” where no answers lie. At any age.
I hope you find your happiness in your heart ….