“Winds In The East, Mist Comin’ In .. Like Something Is Brewin’, About To Begin..”

“ … Can’t put me finger on what lies in store … But I feel what’s to happen, all happened before.” From Mary Poppins …

My life is starting to evolve … again – dynamics are changing, people around me are in flux in ways that will affect me somehow someway somewhere .. sometime soon. It’s time, me thinks, to sit down and look at what areas are in flux and what the potential ramifications are – and to start laying some plans.  There are conversations to be had and decisions to be made. Major ones. Am I terrified? yep! Will I survive them? yep … it’s just getting through the “starting over” process that I see looming … and thus … I feel what’s to happen, all happened before.  Does that mean I’m moving backwards or forwards?

    • My daughter and I share an apartment – we are both single – and we have her 2 boys every other week. The arrangement has worked for us for the last year while we have both been in transition.  She has started a new relationship with a very old friend and they are talking possible marriage.  I’m happy she has someone in her life that she is happy with – the last one was a disaster!
    • I am in a friendship that has recently taken on hues of a relationship and he is wanting me to spend more time with him .. and perhaps move forward with our relationship.  There are many things (potential deal breakers from each of our sides) we need to talk about before we would take that step.
    • My son (with whom I’ve spent the summer) would love for me to move to NYC, live with them, and since they are “considering talking seriously about starting a family” as they are in their mid-late 30’s, would enjoy having Gramaree close at hand.  Having bi-coastal kids is a challenge for me!
    • I am a stage of my life where I am literally reconsidering and honestly discovering what I want to do with my life. I know I do not want to work for a corporation again (done that for 40+ years …) – don’t know that I have the motivation to do a home-based business that involves the kind of selling I’ve done for the last 15 .. I know that I have aspired to write since I was 14 years old … never had the time because I was married and then had a family between 18 and 21 … and have worked full time since I was 17 years old … having the opportunity to write freely now that I am on unemployment is becoming more and more enticing. I am also somewhat committed to helping my “friend” with his business …

At this moment, I truly don’t know where my life is heading … what a freeking adventure!  Scared to death and excited at the same time about all of the possibilities!  Including getting through the next year and a half so I can tap my social security … or finding a sugar daddy who will give me that white picket fence and garden to play in … the way I thought I’d be at this stage of the game … (oh, sorry – that’s a different dream … lol)

My biggest concern is that I don’t want to “settle” any more – I seriously want to figure out what’s best for me this time … something I’ve never done before … I guess in the mean time, I’ll enjoy the breezes until I figure out how the winds of change will blow …   change is, after all … inevitable.

And don’t forget …. “Practically perfect people never permit sentiment to muddle their thinking. “ Thank you, Mary Poppins …


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