Relationships … friendships? more? … and the whole scenario that comes to mind is so interesting that I simply have to put it out here for my own analysis as well as for feedback from others …
Once widowed … once divorced – both intrinsically challenging in their own rights … history under the bridge … mostly … but as we all know, it is our life experiences who shape who we truly are. Six months ago I would have said … no, never, not again. I don’t need the “M” step to make a relationship work. If I ever did, it would be for all the right reasons …
IF I EVER DID, IT WOULD BE FOR ALL THE RIGHT REASONS …. and therein, my friends, lies the burning question. What are the reasons why someone would remarry at ? Or 50? Obviously not because we are young and innocent, with our whole lives, children, careers and white picket fences ahead of us. Those of us who have “been there, done that” for whatever reasons will have different responses from those who have not taken the step, and will have different responses from each other based on our individual journeys.
WHAT AM I LOOKING FOR IN A RELATIONSHIP … FRIENDSHIP …. PARTNER?
Someone who I enjoy spending time with and doing things with; that I trust will honor my heart, which I have given freely; that is independent enough to enjoy spending time on their own with their own interests and is comfortable/secure enough for me to do the same; who “has my back” during challenging times I ask for it but is not offended if I choose not to take it.
Someone who is, first and foremost, a best friend and lover ..
It boils down to really being more of a partnership … a coming together of two people who, because of their own life experiences, has a more relaxed view of the future … who already understands and accepts that no-one is perfect. And is happy to share their life with you.
Do I expect it will last forever? I don’t know. My history (experience) tells me .. not really. It hasn’t yet. Would I like to find someone to happily spend the rest of my life with? Sure … I would LIKE to … I don’t HAVE to.
Am I looking for a sugar daddy to take care of me? Absolutely not.
I am in a relationship … friendship … (because friendship rather than relationship is what we prefer to call it) that over the last 3+ years has proven to be comfortable in spite of the fact that both of us are a) afraid of committing; b) not interested in committing; c) want to spend our time together enjoying each other for the long run; d) want the “freedom” to move on … e) none of the above … f) all of the above … I don’t know if we are more afraid of it not working … or of it working …
And it is still new, virgin territory for me.
So, my single Boomer friends … what is your experience? How do you approach relationships/friendships? What are your expectations, hopes, dreams?
I want to know …. namaste (I honor you …..)