Itty Bitty’s Moving

Hello my friends, I am in the process of transfering my blog to my new website – please check out the new website, and register there to continue following me while I’m in this strange time of transition!

With any luck within a week everything here will be there …

Thank you!

The Itty Bitty Boomer

Checking in to Grossinger’s Resort – reblogged from Abandoned NYC

When I was a teenager bored as hell during summer vacations, I always thought it would be perfection to spend a summer in the Catskills at a resort the way folks from NYC did … wildly beyond 2 weeks at Girl Scout camp!  Swimming, innumerable activities, forging summer friendships and summer crushes … dances, dining, sort of 5-star camping …..

And then Dirty Dancing came out years later and, just as I imagined when I was a teen,  Nobody Puts Baby In The Corner!  The summer dreams of a California teen came flooding back – and I knew it was somewhere like Grossinger’s Resort that I had been dreaming of.  Too bad it was closed in 1970, long before the movie came out, though the movie was set in the late 60’s.

Checking in to Grossinger’s Resort – a look at what remained of this grand resort as of 2011 – on a wonderful blog called Abandoned NYC – is a marvelous look at a lifestyle that once was … an era that has sadly passed when families actually spent summer vacations together … well, somewhere they did! But, hey, I still don’t understand why a dinner/dance club couldn’t be successful with us Baby Boomers!

Namaste! And thank you, Will at Abandoned NYC for sharing this lovely piece of Americana!

Itty Bitty

The Committee Meeting

Sunday there was a committee meeting … all morning … in my head and in my gut.  I hate those committee meetings … what I call my style of anxiety attacks.  I couldn’t even figure out what triggered it … or what to do about it.  Thank Goddess the chairperson finally adjourned the meeting … somewhere along the line.

The agenda went something like this …

1) Is he upset about something and is waiting to talk to me about it?

2) Why won’t my son in New York call me back?  Is he upset with me?  Is there something wrong in his life that he can’t talk to me about?  Is his new job going ok? Are he and his wife having problems?

3) How can I help my daughter slow her own racing mind down?  Is she seeing her ex husband again? I know the creep wants back in her life.

4) Are we ever going to figure out what is going on with my 13-year old possibly autistic/bi-polar/schizo-something/oppositional defiance disorder grandson? Is he going to hurt himself or someone else?

5) What if I lose my job again?  How am I going to carry my share and help my daughter?  Why can’t I lose this 35 lbs I’ve gained over the last 4 years? I’m starting to feel like a failure again.

6) Am I doing enough to help hubby with his business? Am I keeping the house clean enough?

And on and on and on …

My reality is that it’s all “in my head” – life is good, I know the answers to most of these things I question about myself.  It’s just that every now and then I fall into a self-sabotaging mode.  And as I sat in the car on Sunday morning, anxiety gripping at my chest and gut – from somewhere deep inside came that voice … STOP!  Stop this insane meeting of all your insecurities.

1 & 6)   There was nothing going on with hubby – we were both a little tired and he was just quiet, waking up as we were driving a couple of hours away to do some jobs for his business.  I’d just spent Saturday doing domestic chores with his help … it’s all ok.

2)  I don’t have to talk to my son every week – they live in NYC, he is dealing with a new job (thank goodness they were unscathed by Hurricane Sandy so they are truly ok) – the time he and my daughter in law is limited so after jobs they are probably doing what we all do – being busy with their lives

3)  My daughter’s therapists are dealing with her medical issues – she is in good hands and I know in my heart regardless of how much her creep/abuser ex husband tries, he will never get back into her life.

4) There is an amazing team of mental health professionals working with my grandson, his school, my daughter and my grandson’s father to figure out what is going on in his head and how to best help him cope with life ….

My job is not to FIX 3 and 4, it is to be there to be there for them and cheer them on and to help in any way I can.

5)  If the owner of the venue where I’m working (and LOVING working)  decides to sell it (which he may…) I will be fine – I have a loving, supportive husband and all will be well. And I will lose the 30 lbs I need to lose.  I just need to get my head out of my “committee” and refocus.

Old habits/behaviours  die hard – I spent the greater part of my adult life believing that I have to be everything to everybody ….. fix everything …. take on full responsibility for everything/body.   We don’t have to do that, do we?

And the other thing I realized is that these Committee meetings?   I think I seriously need to get back to holding them here … getting all that stuff out of my head and onto “paper” as it were.  I know I’m not the only one dealing with these kind of issues.  Life is always ups and downs.  My problem is that when things stay “up” for too long, I start wondering when they will all fall “down” ….

Damn that Committee! And I’m happy to be back here –

Meeting adjourned …

On The Road Again Round 1

Since last Saturday, I have been in my own bed twice … to San Diego on Saturday, January 21, and back to Sacramento on Sunday, January 22, arriving home near mid night Sunday night. I left again Tuesday morning for Reno on business, and arrived home today about 2 pm. It’s been a great week!

Saturday’s journey, Round 1, was with my 16-year old grandson to attend my brother & sister-in-law’s 48th anniversary celebration. I haven’t seen them in 3 years. Keeping this connection is critical to me since our parents are now all gone, and we see or talk to each other not often enough. TO complicate things further, they are currently spending most of their time somewhere south of Tijuana at her mother’s adobe ranch house – no phone, no cell service, no internet. It was great to see them!

At 71, my brother is more a clone of our dad every day – physically, body language, mannerisms … uncanny.  My sister-in-law, a few years older than he, is adorable and crazy!  They have probably six kids between them (a 60’s blended family), a gaggle of grandchildren and an ever-growing population of great grandchildren.  I think there may even be a great great on the way.  My grandson was amazed to meet so many cousins! He knows his great Auntie and Uncle and a few of the cousins, but he met more 2nd and 3rd cousins than he ever knew existed.

Sunday morning we were back on the road to Santa Monica where my darling daughter-in-law is in a Helen Hunt production of Thornton Wilder‘s “Our Town”.  She performed in an Off-Broadway production in New York at Barrow Street Theater  a few years ago which turned out to be the longest running production of the play ever.  The Director, David Cromer, has his own interpretation of the script.  Helen Hunt played the role of Stage Manager for a few months in New York and loved the production so much that she brought it and much of the cast to Santa Monica’s College Of Performing Arts Broad Stage (click to see article in LA Weekly).   My was visiting last weekend as well (missing his sweetie) so we got to visit him too!  Lunch before Sunday matinée …. then a walk down Pacific Palisades Park … then on to the Theater for the play.  It’s always so fun to see Daughter In Law perform.  She has a very minor role, to be sure, but is also understudy for two of the main female leads.  Since most of her work is in New York or the East Coast region, seeing her so close to home was grand!

Itty Bitty, Son & Daughter-In-Law
Itty Bitty and Thing 1 Pacific Palisades

We hit the road back to Sacramento at 4:30 pm, arriving home at 11:00 pm.  We listened to an audio book version of The Girl With The Dragon Tatoo on the way down and back – um… had to skip parts of a few chapters that were not quite appropriate for a 16-year old, but the overall story was enthralling and passed the long drive much quicker!

It was a perfect weekend! Amazingly good time with my grandson, Thing 1 – he is so bright, funny, engaging, easygoing – having his company made the trip even more fun!  In a day and age when so many teenagers are aptly named “MEAN-AGERS”, he has his moments, but not one occurred in the 2 days we spent together!   It’s always fun and reaffirming to see my siblings, and I’ll never miss the opportunity to spend time with my son.  New York City is so far away and visits are often far between.

Exhausted … but happy … we’ll do it again soon!  Reno and On The Road Again Round 2 is next – and soon …

Where have you been lately?

The Loving Spoonful Had It Right ….

Hot town, summer in the city, Back of my neck getting dirty and gritty. Been down, isn’t it a pity,
doesn’t seem to be a shadow in the city. All around, people looking half dead, walking on the sidewalk, hotter than a match head… UGH!

I’ve been visiting my son and daughter-in-law in Brooklyn for the last month as she’s been recovering from being struck by a speeding bicyclist in Prospect Park.  It’s been delightful (other than the initial reason for my visit) helping with whatever I can (chasing down medical records, domestic chores, meals, accompanying her to appointments as a 2nd set of ears, walking the dog-on-prozac, etc) and especially just spending time with them.   Until this last week, even the weather has been delightful!

  Prospect Park – it’s beautiful if you’ve never been there! All 550 acres of it!

Until this last week …. Now, I am a California boomer from the Sacramento Valley and we get our fair share of hot summer weather with stretches of 100+ degree heat waves … dry heat … and then the wonderful delta breezes arrive from San Francisco Bay …. or we can escape the heat by simply going to San Francisco where the temperatures are almost certain to be 30 degrees or more cooler on the ocean.  But this East Coast excessive heat deal?  I have a whole new respect for the people here who have no escape from this truly oppressive heat – and who live with no air conditioning.  I couldn’t do it.  105 degree temperatures with heat indexes of 110 to 115? UGH! again!

Last night my son and I decided to head back into Manhattan to the West Village at about 8:30 – it was still about 90 degrees and truly oppressive.  Thank goodness for air conditioned subways!  We went to Jefferys Grocery  on Waverly Place for some incredible seafood (oysters, clams, shrimp and crab legs) and wine and then onto Highlands Contemporary Gastropub on West 10th for beverages … stout ales and Pimms Cup!  Yum!

I also wondered how many bachelor parties were in progress at the Stonewall Inn in celebration of today’s first 800 legal same-sex marriages!  Kudos to the State of New York for passing this and congratulations to all you wonderful same-sex couples who are finally able to legally celebrate your unions!  Hopefully the State of California will not be far behind you.

I am excited that we are going an hour and a half north to Connecticut today – to my son’s boss’s house for an employee appreciation event – partly because I’ve never been to Connecticut and now with this heat wave that they have a swimming pool!  The though of sitting even partly submerged in a pool is almost overwhelming!  We are also very much looking forward to a day out of the city – away from the claustrophobia of the buildings and added heat of the traffic and into a little more country environment.  Maybe it won’t be so hot? Probably not, but at least a different view!

Stay cool, everyone – and will you do me a favor?  In honor of Leiby Kletzky, the 8-year old senselessly murdered in Kensington last week, and in honor of his parent’s wishes, please do a random act of kindness for someone today …

May your soul find peace ….  Namaste ….